Emerald

I have been really depressed lately, given all the unusual circumstances life has given us in the past few months, so I have been retreating even more often into my refuge—onomastics, baby names.

It seems silly to be researching something when Michael and I have all ready picked out a name for our little Belly Bumbler, but it really is soothing to me and there are a few hundred pregnant women on my forums that are searching for help naming their own little additions. All of this has prompted me to write blog posts about old news (since there is no new news going on quite yet, I figure it will be okay just this once….or twice)—why we chose the names we chose for our older children.

This first post is going to be about our oldest, Emerald, because this saga in a way informs the next two.

My first pregnancy was…let’s suffice to say it was unexpected. I have thought about names my entire life, so I had some favorites picked out long before I had ever met Michael. Most of my boy names were off the list because neither of us wanted to use names too close to family—

My top pick for boys’ names was hands down Stephen. I fell in love with the name Stephen when I did a project in church as a girl about the story of the stoning of Stephen in Acts. You would think that would super turn me off from the name, but I actually found the story beautiful—peace and utter faith, even in the face of death. Unfortunately, Michael’s uncle is named Steven, and Michael and I had agreed that to avoid confusion we would not use names that were too close to the core family…..so Stephen was out.

I also really liked Michael, which I obviously could not use (it was a name Mom considered when pregnant with me); Luke (ex-boyfriend. Free advice—if you love a name, NEVER date someone with that name!!); and Varian. Varian was the only viable option but Michael super seriously hated it. Like…seriously.

Boy’s names were frustrating, but that is okay, because I actually knew from the moment that I found out I was pregnant that I was having a baby girl. Don’t ask me how I know; I was just very taken with the conviction. Maybe it was because of a dream I had right before admitting that all the vomiting and crying and sleeping round the clock might actually be a baby. I dreamt that I had an infant girl with dark curly hair and very green eyes sleeping on my chest. In my dream, I knew her name was Irish Lynn. When I woke, I could still feel the weight of the little body on my chest, and I formed an attachment to the name.

Unfortunately, Michael was not sold on Irish, or the other two female names that I had loved growing up—Scarlett and Charlotte (Charlie).

It does not matter how compatible you and your significant other are; it doesn’t matter how you love all the same things, or how much you have in common, or how you agree on everything…when it comes to baby names, you will NOT be seeing eye to eye, and there will be a ton of disagreement.

Anyways, so back to my story: One name Michael and I did agree on was Benjamin Reilly, if the baby was a boy. Another rule of naming—if you easily settle on one name, you are going to have the other gender. After some selling, Michael started to like his great-grandmother’s name for our baby girl…Tula.

Tula Lynn was super adorable, and it had family meaning; it was unique but not too weird (our “style”—I will tell you, that is not a style. That is such a broad sweeping statement; a style is much more defined than that). Anyways, it felt like we had settled on a name. But the overwhelming feedback was not positive—people were confused and disliked the name. Had I known back then what I know now about names, I would have shrugged it off. But at the time, I wanted to please everyone, so I abandoned the name we both loved and kept looking.

At some point, I had crafted a master list of names that others had suggested to us as their favorites for our baby, complete with middle names. That was stupid—seriously. Using a name I didn’t love because someone else liked it was not a good gift to give to our daughter. I needed to find what our individual styles were and combine them to find a name.

Michael tended to like what he liked with complete disregard to popularity, style, or meaning. Most of his could be linked back to his interests though—if he could make some connection with a positive memory, he liked the name. One of his favorite names was Sophia because of a book he had read when he was younger. I liked Sophia, and had even started considering Sophia Gwen, but when I referred to my bump by Sophia or Sophie, it just didn’t feel right. The baby I was carrying was not a Sophie to me, if that makes sense.

My personal naming style was much more broad and all over the place. I liked traditionally boy names for girls, as well as artistic names, romantic names, foreign names…I later discovered that what I liked was from literature, because it combines all the romance and artistic expression that I liked.

I want to say that we picked a name and stuck with it and were ready for delivery day, but the truth of the matter was, we were just as confused at 9 months as we were at the beginning. One name that we both really liked was Katie Lynn, and we even called her by that name for a few months before she was born, but we could not settle on a proper first name—Michael was okay with using just Katie, but I wanted something formal, but not Katherine. We argued our way into a stalemate, and Katie Lynn was out as well.

Going into the c-section three weeks before I knew the baby was going to be there, I am frantically asking every nurse we are passing if they have any suggestions for what I should name this child. One suggested Emma Leigh. I hated that, just outright. But Michael really liked Emma, and it was awfully cute. What could it be short for? Em…Emily…Emeline…Emerald?

My brother has a very close friend that has the name Emerald, and it was everything that I was searching for—romantic and artistic and unique but not weird and oh-so-beautiful. The original Emerald is a photographer and had left her business information for us, including her name in beautiful script. Michael and I were both enthusiastic about this name. The two middle name considerations—Lynn and Renae—were both family names; Lynn is Michael’s middle name and Renae is mine. Emerald Renae had a better ring, so when she was a day old, we announced our little girl’s name:

Emerald Renae Wearden

Since I have chosen the name, I have found more and more justification for why it is the most perfect name in the whole world. I am really great at that =)

Emerald is an English name, derived from the gemstone and meaning “precious jewel”. The stone is believed to impart love to the bearer, just like our perfect Emerald did for us. The emerald is one of four precious stones—diamond, ruby, sapphire, and emerald. As far as popularity goes, it was only on the Social Security Administration’s top baby names from 2000 until 2002, and even then it was in the high 900’s (not widely used at all). The stone is my best friend, Erika’s, most favorite and green her favorite color, and they would share the same initials, EW. My sister’s name is also a precious gem name, Amber, and my much beloved great-grandmother’s birthstone is emerald (although Emerald herself has the birthstone of sapphire).

Some people would argue that we crossed from unique all the way into just bizarre; but Emerald shares a style with other well-accepted names. It is a jewel name, like Pearl, Ruby, and Amber; it is a color, like Violet, Rose, and Jade; and it is a word name, like Autumn, Melody, and Jasmine. It has the full capability of becoming a mainstream name, it just hasn’t.

Renae is my middle name, as well as my mother’s middle name. It is an English variation on the French Renee, which means “born again”, making Emerald’s full name meaning “precious jewel, born again”. Renae has never been popular for either gender.

As much fun as I have with baby names, I found that whole process exhausting and discouraging and not as advertised. I had this mental image that I would come across the perfect baby name in a book, suggest it to Michael who would love it as well, and together on the day that our baby was born we would share it with all our friends and family to widespread happiness and approval. It was nothing in the slightest like that.

Overall, though, I think Michael and I are happy with the name we chose. It on occasion been frustrating—for instance, people always think we are saying Emeril, so they uncertainly say “…bam?” accompanied with a trademark hand motion, in confusion. But Emerald is the perfect name for her, and I can’t imagine any other name suiting her better =)

~Andie~