Saturday, September 29, 2012

School News, General Updates

I am hoping that before I finish this post, the vet will call with the results of the second blood test for Pepper. As of right now, the plan is: this is the 8th day since she has last eaten. We cannot perform a liver biopsy because the liver is needed to filter out the anesthesia and as her little liver is on the fritz, she might not wake up. The underlying cause of the problems are still unknown, but we are treating the symptoms. If her ALT level has decreased by at least half (down from 1900 to 950 or below) we will discuss bringing her home today. If it has not, she will stay in the hospital for the weekend.

No news on Aunt Darla as of now.

Just got off the phone with the vet (glorious part of writing a blog post is that it happens on your own timetable). Pepper took a couple of bites of turkey hot dog this morning and her mood is greatly improved. She still turns her nose up at most food, but her liver values have improved a good deal. Not quite enough to bring her home yet, but by Monday hopefully she will be all to the groovy. Hurrah!

Okay, moving on from the dog. The kids at school.

Emerald is doing just fantastically. When there is a change in the routine, like during Rylan's birthday "party", she can have a bit of a meltdown; a few minutes by herself in the hallway always calms her down and gets her to feeling better. To motivate positive behavior, we have started getting her a new little charm (less than $1 each) for her charm bracelet for every entire week that she gets all blue bears--no disciplinary problems at school. If she does have to move her bear, which has never gone above yellow bear (a note home and a short timeout during recess), then she and Daddy and I have a talk about why it wasn't okay for her to do that and she is grounded from technology like her DS for the afternoon.

Tuesdays I volunteer to help pre-k and the two kindergarten classes with lunchtime and recess--it just gives the parents a chance to see the kids during the day, get to know their classmates, and help out the teachers with some 30 odd kids. It is really sweet getting to see Emerald interacting with her peers, and they are some sweet, darling little children in her class.

Little rundown of some of the kids I have gotten to know: Keelyn is the artistic redhead that is Emerald's center partner; they paint pictures for each other, and she loves to pet Benjamin when I bring him with me. Caleb is the "bad boy" (he is actually very sweet, though he does have some behavioral problems) that gets along with Emerald like oil and water, but they can't seem to stay away from each other--he makes her feel better when other kids are not playing nicely, and she considers him her "best boy friend". Faith is Emerald's best friend. She is absolutely precious, with long dark hair and a big grin on her face every time I see her. She is a perfect match for Emerald personality-wise--kind-hearted and sweet with a bit of a dramatic, spirited flair. Every time she sees me, she gives me a big hug.

Lillie is a shy, timid little mouse that has been coming more and more out of her shell; Natalie is the petite blonde you can see being head cheerleader one day, but is sneaky and forever in trouble; Justice is the child that is having separation anxiety from his mommy and appreciates lots of hugs and reassurance whenever I am around. Rylan is the teeniest little girl you can imagine with black hair down to her bottom and big, soulful eyes; she has some hearing difficulty and wears hearing aids, and she is the youngest girl in the class--just turned four this month. Taylor is the tomboy that I can see becoming a doctor because she is concerned and compassionate but absolutely fearless. Andrew is the crazy cute brunette with the dimple; for those it is meaningful to, he reminds me of Joseph Forrest from Argyle (I keep directing Emerald to him, but she finds Caleb much more exciting!).

There are a few kids that I know passingly but haven't really spent as much time with: Reed, Garryt (who my only reference point for is that he refused to let Emerald play basketball with the boys and made her cry), Ashlyn, and Megan. The others will make big impressions by wanting you to push them the entirety of recess or carry them everywhere or want to tell me all about their homes and families; those others tend to be more independent and less interested in the stranger taking their trash at lunchtime.

The upside is that I am making friends as well. Carolyn (Taylor's grandmother) volunteers with me on Tuesdays; she is this spunky California girl whose daughter is getting her masters in child psychology, emphasis in autism while she works at the Burkhart Center. Hope is Faith's mom; Christy is Lillie's. Justice's mom talks to me every morning and Gabriel gives her hugs every time he sees her which is simultaneously baffling and awesome. It feels good to feel like I am finding my niche, becoming part of the community.


Yikes!! Enough about Emerald and her class all ready! I could go on for days. End story: our little princess is doing fabulous, having inherited the social butterfly trait from her Glo and her quick learning and enthusiasm for academia from...well, take your pick--we are all a bunch of nerds here. (No offense if you consider yourself cool. I am sure you are. What's not cool about a pocket protector?)

Moving on: Gabriel!

Gabriel is making some very exciting progress. First, his reports from school are improving significantly; they have become better and better ever since Ms. Reynolds returned from maternity leave. She is a joyful, energetic sweetheart of a woman and Gaby responds so well to her. There are still some issues arising--though he is now unable to kick off his shoes ever since we invested in the hightop converse shoes, he gets too excited and accidentally (but painfully) bites his aides and when he is frustrated, he is known to throw things, pinch, or pull hair. He bit one of his aides right on the boob last week and I have been racking my brain for the appropriate "I'm sorry my son bit your tit" kind of gift. (I assume a gift card from hooters would be in bad taste). We are working on him respecting people's personal areas and not getting aggressive, but in a weird way these are also considered improvements--though it is a negative form, it is an attempt at communication and trying to tell us how he is feeling and what he is thinking. All we have to do now is teach him the proper ways to express those thoughts, and we are groovy.

The second good news is that he is definitely showing signs of trying to communicate more. He will sign "more" or "please", "fish", "food", "drink", or "on". He hugs to say hi and blows kisses when it is time to leave, and has attempted (successfully, though not consistently, in most cases) verbal exchange--going back and forth with saying "okay" with me, saying "hi" when he gets off the bus, calling for "mama" or "dada", and labeling himself "gaga". Speech and OT are going so well, with him greeting Erin and Emily enthusiastically at the door and staying on task for most if not all the time.

With Emily (the speech therapist), they share snack first where he will sign "more fish" for more goldfish or "more cookie" for cookies; they put puzzles or Mr. Potato Head together using picture exchange and choices; then finally they sing "If You're Happy and You Know It". He cannot resist that song--even if he is pretending he is not paying attention, when it gets to stomp your feet or "hurray!" he can't stop himself from participating. Eye contact with Ms Emily is so great, and you can tell he really does just honestly like her. Which it would be hard not too--she is one of the most cheerful, positive people I have ever met in my life.

In OT with Ms. Erin, he practices picking things up with the pincher grasp, manipulating multiple items in his hand, pushing beans, paperclips, or fuffy balls into containers, fitting puzzle pieces in, crossing the mid-line of his body to accomplish tasks and use both hands productively, and buttoning and unbuttoning buttons. These are all tasks to improve his fine motor skills; we also discuss sensory issues--while he is not sensory defensive (freaking out if his hands get dirty, unable to stand the tag in his clothes, etc), he is incredibly sensory seeking (hand flapping, banging head on furniture, etc). To combat this, we try to give him a lot of sensory input, meaning spinning him, swinging him, deep pressure compressions, joint compressions, massages, running, jumping, pushing heavy objects, etc; we also give him exciting flavors in his food such as ginger, hot sauce/wing sauce, garlic, and lemon pepper as his overactive auditory sense seems to be drowning out his olfactory (scent) and gustatory (taste) senses. This just makes meal times more exciting for him.

The third and greatest of the news for Gabriel: It has been nearly a week and a half since he last played with his poo!!

This particular difficulty has been consuming all of my time and focus, causing a great deal of stress monitoring Gabriel every second, wearing special outfits, and cleaning and sanitizing (or if all else fails, throwing away) everything that he gets his fecal artistry on. It has caused considerable strain on both Michael and myself because he would do it as often as five times in one day, allowing me barely enough time to clean up the last mess before he would make a new one. With him being so demanding, I have had less time, energy, and patience left for Emerald and Benjamin. Michael would come home from work to find a wife on the edge of a breakdown, too sick to even contemplating making dinner, and have to take over cooking and cleaning and the children while I tried to rid my house of the awful smell and compose myself to face it all again the next day.

I know: super gross. That is an apt description of our lives these past few months.

Now that his communication is improving, Gabriel will now try his hardest to let us know that he needs to be changed. He will take my hand and place it on his backside, crawl into my or Michael's lap so that we are in a position to check him, dropping his pants in front of us, or set out a pull-up and wipes before leading me over there. When we can, we have him wear feetie pajamas backwards with the feet cut off so that it is difficult for him to take them off or get inside. I cannot tell you what a relief it has been to have that one less worry--for it to be okay for Gabe to go to his room and look at books while I change his brother or talk to Emerald about her day at school; to not have to worry every time I see a kid with a toy if it is clean. It has improved the harmony of our home a great deal.

Whoo, this is turning into quite the epic post. On to Benjamin!!

Ben and I have more or less quiet days. We do laundry, watch mommy's shows, and play together. He is still big on naps, which I am appreciating. On Wednesday so that he and I can get some socialization, I work in the nursery at our church during women's bible study. My first official week was last Wednesday; there were three of us workers in the room, which was good because we had 8 babies ranging from 4 months to 18 months. Benjamin of course was there--he was in some sort of competition with Kirby, a little boy who wanted to eat everything Ben was eating and who Ben couldn't stand seeing me hold. Two 7 month twin boys named Nash and Knox were set up in the baby swings and Benjamin liked to help me push them as they fell asleep. Cecily is a pretty 10 month old blonde baby that Benny likes to pet; Kinsley plays more or less by herself, but gets emotional occasionally. Eli had never been away from his mother before and he cried the entire time, refusing to calm down regardless of what we did. Eventually, he would just cling to our pants and shirts, begging to be picked up--to give us relief for the last 30 minutes, the director of the bible class came and walked him around. After that it was almost eerily quiet. The 4 month old was a sweet, smiley little girl that I honestly cannot remember the name of off the top of my head. She slept most of the time any way.

I think it is a perfect little outing for me and Ben every week.

Things are going well for Michael at work. He is having a good month selling, which should help when we get the vet bill. A cold front blew in three days ago, making it rainy and cooler, a big relief. With the stress of Pepper and Aunt Darla and everything, I have been suffering from a bad case of nerves--since Pep went into the hospital, I haven't eaten anything except cereal because it all smells too fragrant, and when I went to talk to Dr. Carruthers about Pepper, I started sobbing into the dog's fur, officially making all three of us uncomfortable. To combat this bout of the crazies, I have been praying, meditating, stretching and doing yoga, drinking herbal teas, listening to my favorite Ludovico Einaudi, and writing down my worries and putting them in a "God Box" so that I can give it over to God. Thus far, nothing has helped; I may need to go to the doctor and get medicine or a prescription for a massage (wonder if he will toss in a mani-pedi....for my health, of course).

I think I have probably said everything that you needed to know and a great deal that you didn't, so I am probably going to hop off right after saying this last thing: if you got pictures of Emerald and Benjamin and wondered why there was a suspicious lack of Gabriel....Gabriel finds getting his picture taken in a formal setting like that stressful and he does not sit still or listen, resulting in a frustrating, upsetting time for all parties involved. Since it was Emmie and Ben's birthdays, we went ahead and got theirs made; we also ordered some of Gaby's school pictures (though last years were an absolute disaster). Michael and I have plans of taking him by himself for his birthday, wearing him out first at the bouncy place in the mall first and stuffing him full of food, as well as setting up a game plan with the photographer in advance, so he will be unrushed, unstressed, and hopefully more agreeable.

Okay, so this took me like an hour and a half to write. I have to go and actually get things done now.

LOVE! Andie

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